What are your plans for your next date night? Whether you are staying in for a candlelit dinner at home or heading out to an activity, you can use this opportunity to reconnect with your partner on the bigger picture. Strong marriages periodically take stock of their relationship to celebrate what is going well and improve what needs work.

Here are some questions to get you started:

Questions for Married Couples

  • What are you (individually and as a couple) hoping to accomplish in the coming year?
  • What do you like about your relationship right now?
  • What would you like to improve?
  • Where do you see yourselves as a couple in the next few years?
  • What traditions do you have that you want to continue this year?
  • What new rituals would you like to establish this year?
  • What do you think has been the best year so far as a couple and why?
  • What is one thing you wish you knew about your spouse and that your spouse knew about you?
  • What personal goals do you have for the year?
  • Is there a date you always wanted to have with your spouse that you haven’t gotten around to yet?
  • What are you most proud of in your relationship?
  • What do you admire about your partner?
  • What memories do you want to make with your children this year?
  • Is there a family vacation you have always wanted to plan?
  • What dreams do you have for your marriage?
  • What do you consider to be the best moments in your marriage so far?
  • Can you remember a difficult time you and your partner overcame together?
  • How is your marriage different today than when you first got married?

Designate a portion of time to reflect on the story of your marriage. Remembering past challenges and celebrations with your partner is one way to stay connected. Consider where you want your story to go from here and build a plan with your partner.

If you feel uncertain about doing a check-in conversation as a couple on your own, consider participating in marriage counseling once a year as a check up on the relationship. The environment and established appointment may be all you need to focus on one another and jump start much needed conversations and connection.